Dear Diary,
I think it has been a month or so since I last wrote to you. My apologies for not writing for I have been keeping myself busy with so many little projects of my own. How has it been for you? Are you doing great while I have been gone? I hope you will not think that I was neglecting you. I have thought about you all the time and I wanted to write to you but everytime I switch on my laptop there will always be something that would keep me from paying my attention to you.
There are so many things that I do on my laptop nowadays. I socialize more online, I am learning how to make money online and I indulge in my hobbies online. You know that I have started the latest craze of internet which is the Facebook. I think I have got myself addicted to it but it is still under controlled. Being on Facebook reminds me of the time when I first started to get better acquainted with the internet. I got hooked with the chat rooms and you can see me online literally every night without fail. I would chat and email my friends I made online. I hardly surf losing much of the benefits the internet was designed to give. However, I understand now that the time I spent on chatting and making friends online especially from Malaysia comes in handy now since I am living in Malaysia. I have made dozens of friends and can you believe that some of them are my best of friends now? Amazing isn’t it? See what the technologies can do for you if you just know how to maximize its potential?
There are so many things I want to share with you Diary. The stories that I want to tell seems to be endless in my list. I am doing ok now getting along fine with the daily activities in my life. Gummy Bear and I are getting closer and I share most of my usual complaints and joy with her nowadays. I communicate with her through Facebook, phone and instant messenger. We meet sometimes and we have spent some nights together. I can get along with her because I like her ways. She’s not too difficult for me to handle that’s why I think I get along fine with her. She has just broken up with her girlfriend and I hope she will be strong to face it. They have been together for four years and I just couldn’t imagine her sadness and heartaches. A relationship of four years, can you imagine it Diary? My longest relationship was of twenty-six months and I almost went berserk after I ended it. The most accurate description for me after the break up was “A child who has just lost his mother”. Yes Diary that is how I was like. I swear to God, I do not want to go through that phase again. The pain was simply unbearable. It was too much for me to handle. One can only wish that it was all just a bad dream and everything would be back to normal when he wakes up but no, he has to slap his face hard to realize that this is the reality he is living in now. Oh Diary, my only hope for Gummy Bear is for her to know that I am around if she needs a shoulder to cry on. She is such a nice person to be hurting like that.
Diary, I have been very shamelessly vocal on my Facebook lately. Well I think I have the rights and it is happening on my wall anyway without invading into other people’s privacy. I guess I am using Facebook as a channel for my long kept and reserved expressions waiting to be explored. You know that I do not chat anymore and there are no other opportunities for me to get interactive online, especially toward fellow women. When I started Facebook, I had in mind to only have people like me in my friends list. The rule was simple and straightforward. Priority is given to women regardless straight or not. Men are allowed but only if they are lesbians-friendly men. I am slowly increasing the number of friends in my list. I am very selective when approving people who request to be in my friends list. I simply hate to feel that my privacy has been invaded because this is the only channel that I use online to be socially interactive with people of my own kind. I want to make my Facebook a place where I can let it all out. Those inner feelings and expressions that have been kept tight inside need to be express. I want to be able to reach out to women with my writings and thoughts, poems and comments. Allow me to be myself is the motto for my facebook. Apart from my blog, I have my facebook to express my feelings, show my personalities that often people have overlooked, convey my messages across to a community I can call my own and communicate the way I want comfortably without having to worry about people judging me.
Facebook helps me heal from all the heartaches and disappointments that I once had. I carried those pains in my heart and they only make my heart sinks to the bottom little by little each day. Everytime before I went to sleep, I felt my heart beating with sadness that is beyond descriptions. I searched and looked for ways I could divert my attentions to something more positive. And I think I have found it and I am maximizing its ability for my own benefits. And now Diary, I have found ways to make money online and I call it my Internet Millionaire project. I am embarking on this journey and I will not stop or am I going to turn back to the state where I was nothing but a weakling. I am on a journey to find my own way back to whom and what I used to be.
I think it has been a month or so since I last wrote to you. My apologies for not writing for I have been keeping myself busy with so many little projects of my own. How has it been for you? Are you doing great while I have been gone? I hope you will not think that I was neglecting you. I have thought about you all the time and I wanted to write to you but everytime I switch on my laptop there will always be something that would keep me from paying my attention to you.
There are so many things that I do on my laptop nowadays. I socialize more online, I am learning how to make money online and I indulge in my hobbies online. You know that I have started the latest craze of internet which is the Facebook. I think I have got myself addicted to it but it is still under controlled. Being on Facebook reminds me of the time when I first started to get better acquainted with the internet. I got hooked with the chat rooms and you can see me online literally every night without fail. I would chat and email my friends I made online. I hardly surf losing much of the benefits the internet was designed to give. However, I understand now that the time I spent on chatting and making friends online especially from Malaysia comes in handy now since I am living in Malaysia. I have made dozens of friends and can you believe that some of them are my best of friends now? Amazing isn’t it? See what the technologies can do for you if you just know how to maximize its potential?
There are so many things I want to share with you Diary. The stories that I want to tell seems to be endless in my list. I am doing ok now getting along fine with the daily activities in my life. Gummy Bear and I are getting closer and I share most of my usual complaints and joy with her nowadays. I communicate with her through Facebook, phone and instant messenger. We meet sometimes and we have spent some nights together. I can get along with her because I like her ways. She’s not too difficult for me to handle that’s why I think I get along fine with her. She has just broken up with her girlfriend and I hope she will be strong to face it. They have been together for four years and I just couldn’t imagine her sadness and heartaches. A relationship of four years, can you imagine it Diary? My longest relationship was of twenty-six months and I almost went berserk after I ended it. The most accurate description for me after the break up was “A child who has just lost his mother”. Yes Diary that is how I was like. I swear to God, I do not want to go through that phase again. The pain was simply unbearable. It was too much for me to handle. One can only wish that it was all just a bad dream and everything would be back to normal when he wakes up but no, he has to slap his face hard to realize that this is the reality he is living in now. Oh Diary, my only hope for Gummy Bear is for her to know that I am around if she needs a shoulder to cry on. She is such a nice person to be hurting like that.
Diary, I have been very shamelessly vocal on my Facebook lately. Well I think I have the rights and it is happening on my wall anyway without invading into other people’s privacy. I guess I am using Facebook as a channel for my long kept and reserved expressions waiting to be explored. You know that I do not chat anymore and there are no other opportunities for me to get interactive online, especially toward fellow women. When I started Facebook, I had in mind to only have people like me in my friends list. The rule was simple and straightforward. Priority is given to women regardless straight or not. Men are allowed but only if they are lesbians-friendly men. I am slowly increasing the number of friends in my list. I am very selective when approving people who request to be in my friends list. I simply hate to feel that my privacy has been invaded because this is the only channel that I use online to be socially interactive with people of my own kind. I want to make my Facebook a place where I can let it all out. Those inner feelings and expressions that have been kept tight inside need to be express. I want to be able to reach out to women with my writings and thoughts, poems and comments. Allow me to be myself is the motto for my facebook. Apart from my blog, I have my facebook to express my feelings, show my personalities that often people have overlooked, convey my messages across to a community I can call my own and communicate the way I want comfortably without having to worry about people judging me.
Facebook helps me heal from all the heartaches and disappointments that I once had. I carried those pains in my heart and they only make my heart sinks to the bottom little by little each day. Everytime before I went to sleep, I felt my heart beating with sadness that is beyond descriptions. I searched and looked for ways I could divert my attentions to something more positive. And I think I have found it and I am maximizing its ability for my own benefits. And now Diary, I have found ways to make money online and I call it my Internet Millionaire project. I am embarking on this journey and I will not stop or am I going to turn back to the state where I was nothing but a weakling. I am on a journey to find my own way back to whom and what I used to be.
