I Am Sensitive

I Am Sensitive

Monday, February 14, 2011

I Am Going To Take It Like A Man...

Dear Diary,

It has been five days since I started the training for the new job. I have never felt so pressured from work before. I supposed this job gives me tremendous pressure from any other jobs that I have had before. I still remember what I have said during the interview, which is to make a career out of a job. Now I am not sure if I want to make this job my career.

Oh well Diary do not get me wrong. I am not thinking of quitting it is just that I hate how the manager is making me feel. There was a test today at work and the purpose of the test is to show how well we have grasp what is taught to us and how good has the manager done to make us understand. We were told not to worry about the test and not to be intimidated by it because it is just a test and the test will not determined if the company will keep us or not.

I did not get to study for the test because I only knew about the test on Friday and I assumed the manager thought that all of us would have had the whole weekend to study for the test. Some of the others probably would have but not me. My brother got married on the weekend and where would I find the time to study when that happens? I only flipped through the guide and I depended a lot on my memories. For the past four days I have attended the training, this test will somehow show how much I have grasped.

I scored the second lowest and as usual, Mr. Potato said some discouraging or perhaps sarcastic remarks about it. Coincidentally the one who scored the lowest and second lowest have property backgrounds and that made him even happier to do that. The one who scored the highest got a $50 reward. The ex flight attendant scored the second highest, even so he still have so much praises for her. I am beginning to feel a little suspicious. It is not that they have an affair or something but I am just suspecting of something. Why must he always have nice things to say to her and always hold back with her? Perhaps he is afraid that he might burst her bubble or he wouldn’t want to hurt her feelings because she is a looker. I don’t know Diary but seriously, I could not be bothered by it anymore.

It has begun to annoy me a little to the extent that I simply do not care what is going to happen anymore. Mr. Potato keeps saying that the possibility of earning $10K to $20K a month is possible and bla bla bla. I know that and I have heard about it so many times because in sales, there is just endless opportunity to earn unlimited income, the question is just how you are going to do it. He said it as though his company is the only company that provides the opportunity. From my observation and time I have spent with Mr. Potato, all I can say is it strengthens my belief that Caucasians most of the times assume they are superior than Asians. They think they are the Mr. know all.

I am not bored with the company but I am bored at how Mr. Potato always put us down and made us feel so small whenever we answered something wrongly. I guess that is just how the British are aren’t they? I am not quitting Diary, I am going to stay and take every judgments passed on me like a man. I supposed all these comments are starting to teach me how to be invincible to discouraging remarks and comments about myself. Anyway, I have been shortlisted out of 150 resumes and surely, there must be something about me that I have written that has caught his attention.

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