My Forex Ambitions

Dear Diary,

It is Hari Raya Eve and I am on leave from work today and the day after tomorrow. I feel happy being at home with my parents. As usual, I helped mother cooked today and cleaned the kitchen thereafter. i supposed this is my routine until the day I die or otherwise. I do not see myself married to a man so it is unlikely that I will have my own family having to cook for my husband or children on the eve of Hari Raya. At times, I think I am better off married so that I would have less heartbreaks and heartaches. You know how I feel towards men don’t you Diary? Numb. Nothing.  No affection.  So I am assuming, if he were to hurt me, I will not feel it. I will remain calm and carry on with my life like my heart is invincible.  But that is not what I really want is it? Living life not in the mainstream sexual preference is already complicated let alone pretending to be what I am not. I have had enough of those. 

If you ask me about love, I do not have a definite answer to it. I do not even know if I want it because I know it can get nasty. But if I am sensing that love is on its way, I will not deny it. It is confusing now.It is also tiring. Whatever it is, I have learnt not to look for it. What I have learnt now is to make money with Forex. *chuckles* Forex is a definite thing unlike love. Forex is real unlike love and Forex will not hurt me like how love will. Do you know what my plans are Diary? I want to learn as much as I can about Forex for one solid year. I want to trade as much as I can with Forex using the demo account as often as I can until I become good at it. I will turn my USD100 into USD 1000 and turn that USD1000 into USD 10,000 and then I will quit my full time job and become a full time Forex trader. How is that?

I will live with my parents in Tangkak, bring them for holidays, pay the bills, be the provider for them and serve them at their beck and calls. I will set up a low risk business and pay people to run the business for me in Kuala Lumpur and I will come back to Subang Jaya for good. Oh wow…it has always been Subang Jaya with me. Ok, so that is the plan. That is what my mentor told me. Write them down and make them my motivations. I have loads more but I think I will save them for some other time because right now, the main priority is to learn Forex and master the skills of trading. That is the key to my success.

By the way, I have started to trade with my demo account with two entries last night and I had one profit and 1 loss. Not bad for a start. I need to study more about the trading platform because last night was quite haywire trying to understand the functions of the menus. I almost lost my temper but luckily, I managed to put my anger under control. Learning Forex has taught me more about being patient. Reading the books has really given me the upper hand of controlling my temper. Perhaps it is the age, perhaps it is really Forex that has been influencing my mood. Beats me Diary but I know I am serious about changing my life now. I am dangerously ambitious now just like how I was when I was 22. I am feeling that young and dangerous spirit again inside me. I feel the adrenaline rush and I am using it to keep me going with or without love with her.  I will write to you again Diary. Love you.