Down With Fever

Dear Diary,

I am pretty sure that I will come down with fever soon. My eyes are feeling the heat, my head spins and my body feels weak. I did not get caught in the rain therefore I am certain that it is the loads of responsibilities I have to shoulder since Syawal that causes the fever. I am tired, I told you. I have been up early since the first day of Syawal even if I go to bed late.

How are you Diary? I had a viewing appointment this afternoon. It was a young Chinese couple. They seemed interested in the house. I hope to sell this house by end of October as the valuation report would expire on the 12th of November. I hope I can get a good offer soon.

I have not been to the office for a long time. I might be going there this Thursday for a workshop. I did farming on 2 blocks this morning. I wanted to do more but I had to go back early as I needed to send mum off to work but when I got home, my brother decided he could send mum off. I was kind of disappointed because if I had known this earlier, I would have continued farming instead of rushing home. I am not sure if I will do farming tomorrow. It depends on how I am feeling but I am sure if I pop two panadols before I leave home, I will be ok.

I have had many dreams lately. Flying Babe and Infinity came into my dream last night. The message in the dream was so clear and it stays in my head until this second. I really do not know how they are doing now as I have stopped writing to Flying Babe and have stopped talking to Infinity. They probably think that I have stop regarding them even as a friend. Hmm…I just don’t know what to say anymore Diary. There are so many people in my life that I do not know what to say to them anymore at the moment. I do not really know what I am going through actually. So many changes happened all at once. I got confused and I kind of get myself lost in the changes. I am probably still hanging around in the transition period.

At some mornings when I wake up, I do feel a little demotivated and spiritually weak. There are times when all I wanted to do is just lay down and stare at my ceiling. Yes, life has to go on and I am moving on but I supposed the road ahead is winding and it is going to take me some time. Winston Churchill once said, “If you are going through hell, keep going”. This is not hell I am going through it is just a change of environment, a change of situations and circumstances. I have not gotten used to it, that’s all. It has not really sunk in yet. Perhaps I simply need a kick in the teeth. Hey, that may be the best thing in the world for me if it going to make me realize where I am really. Or possibly, I am just missing her. I don’t know Diary.

I have to go. Catch you tomorrow Diary. Love you.