I have had many prospectings since the start of this week. I am currently having 1 room rental listing and it is from a referral of my existing client. I was supposed to go farming today but I changed my mind as it looked like it was going to rain after I took my shower. Furthermore, I had to run some errands for mum at home and so I did not go farming. The clouds were dark but the darkness just went away half an hour later. I really thought it was going to rain.
How was your day Diary? I had a fairly good day. Spent the whole day at home and only went out prospecting at 730 in the evening. It was just one block away from where I live. That's the good thing about having your residential area as your geographical targeted area (GTA). You do not have to waste time travelling. Most of the places are within walking distance. I supposed that is my plan for now. I have a plan and I will draw out my strategy soon.
Mum has been watching 'Nur Kasih' repeatedly until I have memorised the storylines and a bit of its dialogues. She is so 'Nur Kasih' crazy nowadays since she got the box set DVD. It is a good drama with good casts and storylines but it is also a little melodramatic. Well, it is a television drama series anyway so it has to be melodramatic isn't it? Sometimes, I wonder if I could ever wish for anything in 'Nur Kasih' to happen to me in reality. Say for example, the time when Nur is so faithful to Adam even without Adam fulfilling his duty as a husband to her. And how they always manage to meet up coincidentally or bump into each other so easily like as though there are no impossibility in that at all.
I supposed those things happen only in dramas or movies because they are directed and scripted. I often ask myself will I ever run into Flying Babe again someday somehow? It is hard to say because she is there and I am here and it won't look like I will be going to Subang Jaya again for a long time. Do you get what I mean Diary? During the time when I took Air Asia to Brisbane, I would be lying if I did not hope to bump into her. I did not anyway. Well, that is probably because I was not in a drama or a movie is it? You tell me Diary...
That is the very reason why I always prefer to watch dramas adapted from a true story because at least the storylines keep my two feet on the ground. But even if it is adapted from a true story, there will stilll be some scenes created not from true events for dramatic purposes. In dramas, you always have to expect the climax in it because that is what dramas all about. I have to admit that watching 'Nur Kasih' somehow makes me wish and hope for the good things that happened in it to happen in my life silently in my heart. Hope springs eternal in the human heart doesn't it?
It amazes me just how faithful and loyal Nur is, as a woman and a wife altogether after all that she has to go through. If you had watch it Diary, you wouldn't believe it yourself. The level of loyalty she has for Adam is so amazingly huge that only she can understand why. Perhaps I can too. It must have been love, the kind of love that makes one very devouted to another one. No matter what the circumstances are, the love remains and will prevail against any other matters. A love so strong that nothing can tear it apart. Does it exist in reality? Have you ever came across someone with a love like that who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness.
Isn't it great to have someone who can love you like that. Isn't it wonderful to be loved by someone with such integrity. Isn't it a bless if you can make it happen in reality as well. I am smiling now and at the same time, I am shaking my head thinking of the vast differences between reality and fantasy. Perhaps some people might have already experiencing it. It is a big world out there Diary with so many countries, cultures and traditions. I am sure somewhere out there it does exist, it is just that it is not happening to me. Well, maybe it could but I was just too young and wild to see it. I might have overlooked the possibility of having such meaningful relationship.
Looking back, I have never regret what had happened in my life only that I wish I could have done better. I have never understood love. I never thought I must because love lives on its own. It does not ask why and it does not explain why. It just happen you know. Love is no respecter of age or practicality, neither morality: love enters unabashedly where she will, unheeding that her immortal fires burn up human hearts.
Have I found my 'Nur Kasih' along the way? I do not know. I probably have but I let her go. I guess that's just me, always in the lost and found situations. I am not very girlfriend material. Love scares me that I always ask for a break up before the relationship gets too deep even when I knew the ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but to hold hands. Maybe I have overlooked that love doesn't sit there like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; remade all of the time, made new.
I honestly cannot comprehend what is in my heart and who is it really for. If I ever have found someone that I can call my 'Nur Kasih', she probably will just be another fantasy of mine that will never come true because a hundred hearts would be too few to carry all my love for her. Some women love only what they can hold in their arms; while me, only what I can't.
No comments:
Post a Comment